Jasmine Cheatham
11/10/14

In this lesson it talks about how your sentences should flow and balance out. The title of this lesson is Elegance. Authors should give their readers something that makes them want to keep reading, something that will draw their attention and gives them pleasure every time they recall something they read. Just like first impressions you want to stand out and give people something memorable about you. If you don’t give them something memorable then you just blend in with everyone else.  By having balance in your writing you can talk about your topics and ideas by lurching one part to the next.  By having these series of movements your paper is more appealing to your audience. But it is also acceptable to have uncoordinated balance in your writing. When your writing has uncoordinated balance you can balance structures that are not grammatically coordinated. This means that your subordinate clauses can balance out your main clause. This form of writing can help your readers think of ways that they wouldn’t.  I just learned this through this book because I was taught that this format of writing was grammatically incorrect and wouldn’t be acceptable. When ending a sentence you should end the sentence with words that deserve stress. This creates strength to your writing and readers. Also in this lesson it talks about sentence length, the length of your sentence can set a tone to your writing. To sum it up elegant writing should have simplicity of characters as subjects and actions as verbs, complexity of balances syntax, meaning, sound and rhythm as well as emphasis on artful stressed endings.  One thing that really stuck with me was that the authors stated you can’t have elegant writing by reading this book it is something that will or will not naturally occur.  

Jasmine Cheatham

11/4/14

Lesson 9

The concision sums up the other lessons we have previously talked about, making sure that characters match actions to your subjects and verbs. I have a problem sometimes with saying I believe or in my opinion. Is saying “I believe” the same as in my opinion? Or is it okay to use in a paper? When I first entered college, when writing papers I would never proof read. It wasn’t until recently that I started revising and diagnosing my papers. Proof reading is very helpful because there are some things that at the time sounded like it made sense but then proof reading I seen the mistakes I made or some confusion in my sentences.  Also this can make your sentences more direct and clear, what your audience wants. By turning negatives to affirmatives you will express the same idea just taking out words and/or changing them.  The way you organize your paper and the concepts you use will help your paper be strong and direct. Getting to the point and keeping your reading intrigued in what you have to say. This was a helpful book because it has helped me become more aware in the way I write and the structure of my sentences. 

Jasmine Cheatham

English 304

Lesson 8

Your introduction should draw your readers in. You should motivate your readers by stating something that they care about and are interested in. Also, state key points and concepts that you will further discuss in your paper. When writing you should make sure that all of your writing goes together. You shouldn’t bounce around from topic to topic because not only is the writing unorganized but it will confuse the reader. Doing it in a structural sense will help your readers get a clear picture of what you are trying to say as well as lead them up to what you are going to talk about next. In class you asked us if it would be more beneficial to us if we used subheadings. Subheadings will help organize the paper as well as give the reader a hint as to what you will be talking about in the section. Always make sure that there is a point being made in your body paragraphs. I used to ramble when I didn’t know what else to say. In some cases it worked well because I was repeating some of my main points but too much repetition can damage a paper.

            Papers need coherence. As a writer you should make sure that your paper is relevant to your thesis and main points. With being relevant as I mentioned before you have to be organized. You can organize your paper so that it is chronological which a sequence of events is from earlier to recent or vice versa. Coordinating your paper you have two or more sections are equally supporting a common topic. A logical paper is the most complex order, the example and generalization. I have more experience using chronological order because that is what I have been taught to do since grade school. For me it is the most helpful because it helps me build me ideas off of one another.

            Clarity should always be an author’s goal. You want to make your ideas and points as clear and to the point as possible. You don’t want to give your readers a confused idea because that makes your paper less desirable to read and understand. 

Jasmine Cheatham
10/28/14

When writing you have to make sure that you are motivating the reader into reading more. As mentioned in class, people are going to be more interested and engaged to a problem they have been in or a topic that most interest them. When writing make sure to incorporate a question that can answered in writing. I like the idea of conceptual problems. This is when the writer wants readers to understand or believe. This gives the reader more detail on your position as a writer and why you have chosen that position. When I write in most cases it is about things that we have learned in class or in the course material. In English 304 I enjoy that we are able to pick topics that we show interest in. This helps me as a writer and a student to use my prior knowledge and creativity and just flow out whatever comes to mind.  

Jasmine Cheatham

When writing you want to make sure that the end of your sentence is clear, strong, shows cohesion and coherence. Readers want organization, by organizing your sentences you as a writer can help manage long and complex phrases and clauses as well as new information, particularly unfamiliar technical terms. I learned that when you are writing sentences they should be simple and direct because you can’t assume your reader knows what you are referring to, you don’t want to keep them guessing. I think this is important to do when you are correcting your draft of a paper. I like in class how Anna said that all babies “papers” are born ugly. Personally I like that idea because I can let all of my ideas flow and get my points across without having to be super cautious of if I’m doing the paper right. Words and structure of a sentence can effect the voice the reader is going to have. During class when we were doing nominalizations I learned what a lot of teachers were referring to by how to structure a sentence. Prior to this class teacher’s would make comments on my paper about changing my sentence structure and never gave an example of what they were talking about. I would typically just change the sentence around and was done. I wasn’t aware of the structure she was refereeing to. In this lesson Williams talks about stress. Stress of a sentence can make your paper strong. How you end your sentences as mentioned earlier can determine how the reader reads your paper and their judgments about it. As well as having a strong ending as a writer you need to have a strong introduction of a sentence. Emphasizing will help create a clearer, organized, and direct sentence. I need to work on emphasizing the right words in my sentences. 

Jasmine Cheatham

Lesson 5

10/22/14

When writing you should always make sure that your sentences are connecting. This lesson taught me about the way your sentences should be. Your sentences should all flow together as well as having cohesion. I learned the differences between cohesion and coherence, I wasn’t clear on either concepts.  When writing you should present the reader with information that they are already familiar with and then introduce your new information.  As discussed in class, you never want to have your readers clueless. By giving them old information first they can connect your new information and apply it. Sentence structure is important when writing because it keeps your thoughts organized as well as making it easier for your reader to follow what you are saying. Referring back to cohesion, you have to make sure that your sentences fit together and that you’re not just jumping around from topic to topic. By incorporating characters into your writing that will give the reader some previous information, it is important to have them in the front of your sentences.  Overall this lesson taught me about a few concepts and how they work. I know that I will need to work on my writing to make sure that I continue to connect my writing and making sure that it flows. I sometimes bounce my ideas around in my paper because they just come to me as I write and it makes my paper structure unorganized. 

Jasmine Cheatham

10/16/17

Lesson 4

By adding characters to your sentences doesn't leave your readers clueless. In some cases there isn't a need for characters and in these cases as a writer you should have a verb; who is doing what? As a writer you should try to use active voice versus passive because passive adds words and usually draws away from the subject/action. You should only use passive when the agent of an action is self-evident or if it lets you replace a long subject with a short one or when it gives a coherent sequence of subjects. I wrote these out because this is something that is new to me. To sum up there are appropriate times to use different writing tactics. Always make sure that you a subject and a verb or a character and an action in your writing. Be as clear as possible and make sure that it is something your reader can understand.

Jasmine Cheatham

10/16/14

Lesson 3

This section of the book talks about the usage of verbs/actions, subjects and clarity. When writing you have to make sure that what you are trying to say is clear, direct and to the point. Referring back to class discussions every draft or piece of writing may seem clear to the writer but as a reader it may be unclear. In this lesson it talks about this as well. Williams suggest that we all read into our own writing what we want readers to get out of it. One of the reasons being is because as a writer you know the message you are trying to convey so you fill your page with your own ideas and thoughts about a particular topic or subject. Again, being clear about your topic is important especially for your audience. 

Jasmine Cheatham

10/9/14

Style: Lesson 2

This lesson is talking about correctness. The “correctness” or flow of your sentence dictates a clearer and direct understanding. In class we had corrected those sentences on a handout and how the order of a sentence makes a difference in the subject that you are discussing. I liked how this lesson discussed what is considered Standard English and the rules that come with that and the change that has occurred with Standard English. In elementary school some teachers would teach us to use words like “ain’t” while some preferred words like are not.  Teachers teach how they were taught and I just found it interesting how this comes into play with teaching styles. This lesson definitely helped me with grammatical issues that I have come across and explained the reasoning they are errors. In most cases teacher will tell you that you need to change the word or structure without explaining why. 

Question: What are double negatives?

Jasmine Cheatham

10/8/14

Style: Lesson 1

I enjoyed that we went over some of the concerns addressed in this lesson in class. It gave me a more clear understanding of what the author was discussing. In this lesson authors Joseph Williams and Joseph Bizup talked about clarity and understanding discussing the importance that writing should have both. You can tell a lot about ones understanding of a subject through their writing. Some can be direct and clear while others may be abstract and dense. As mentioned in class people tend to have an “ugly” draft when they are writing about something they know a lot about and/or are interested in. Personally I have experienced both unclear and abstract writing and clear and direct. I feel that the more knowledge I know about a subject the more focused my writing will be. Sometimes I feel that my writing will too be structured based on the format given to me by a professor. I am now dealing with a teacher that has given the class a writing assignment and isn’t clear herself on what she wants from us. She hasn’t given feedback and her instructions are unclear. I have attempted to make my paper as focused as possible seeing as how it is a topic I am not strongly familiar with. By her having unclear and dense instructions it is tilting some students’ papers that way as well. 

MEMORANDUM

Date:   September 26, 2014

To:       Anna Plemons

From:   Jasmine Cheatham

Subject: Racial Profiling

Jasmine Cheatham

Proposal

English 304 

          I am choosing to do my research paper on racial profiling with African American males. My research question would be, “What are the effects of racial profiling on African American Males?” For this topic I am going to relate it to Gladwell’s discussion on the Matthew Effect about the x factor, who makes it to the top. After reading about the Matthew Effect I believe that it does apply to racial profiling. There are many instances that are going on in the world that connect racial profiling and the Matthew Effect. I will be able to draft a thesis that lets my readers know where the paper is headed. It might look something like:

             In Outliers, Malcolm Gladwell (2008) Gladwell suggested that there are correlations between factors. One of his examples was that there was a correlation between birthdays and success in the Canadian Hockey League. This is the “x factor” as I mentioned earlier the x factor is who makes it to the top. I will be discussing the effects of racial profiling. There are many reasons why racial profiling effects African American males. I am considering using this link http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2M3zL_C1Y1k on racial profiling in a high end store. Also an article about African American male and imprisonment, how they are “selected.”  

Cooper, F. (2013). We Are Always Already Imprisoned: Hyper incarceration and Black Male

Identity Performance. Boston University Law Review, 93(3), 1190-1204.

 Jasmine Cheatham

Ted Talk

English 304 

Even though Phil Hansen couldn't do art the way he wanted to he found alternative ways to do what he loved to do. Relating back to Gladwell, he discussed many ways on becoming successful. There are many ways to get to the same destination by taking different routes.  He embraced the limitation and by doing so he found even more creative ways to do art. We think that we know what’s best for us and go a certain route and it will take us where we want to go but it isn't the road that we are actually going to take. We have to embrace other alternatives still using the skills we have but to find new and different perspectives, in finding these new possibilities we also have to keep an open mind. There are endless possibilities. 

Jasmine Cheatham

Response 2

9/5/14

English 304

Culture of horror, a world where a man’s reputation is at the center of his livelihood and self-worth (167). Just as a herdsman has to show aggression to prove that he is not weak, people are shaped through nature and nurture. There are environmental influences that help shape everyone. Of course biological factors play a major part but the way one acts and shows the rest of the world sometimes sets a marker for how they are viewed and treated. I know that we as people set the tone for our lives. Growing up I was surrounded by drug addicts, prostitutes, gangs, gunshots from time to time. Growing up in a low income community I knew that I did not want to spend the rest of my life or bring children into a world like this. I knew that I had to act a certain way and make decisions for myself on how the world would view and treat me.

            Just as Dov Cohen and Richard Nisbett conducted an experiment on the reactions of insults to a group of men, in Pullman I believe that some police officers try to get reactions out of people. Not saying that they are racist but I have experienced some profiling and police trying to mess with me in a way that has never happened to me before. I believe partially it is due to lack of low crime in Pullman and that I was black and they knew I am not from here. Just as Cohen and Nisbett described what mattered was where they were from.

            It is never too late to turn your circumstances around, just as Korean Air did. The airline went from going to the worst air line and being talked negatively upon to getting recognition for its transformation. My mother who was the eldest of seven and is the only girl had to raise my uncles by herself. Her mother was not too much involved in their lives. My mom knew she wanted to be supportive of her children when the time came around. She worked over night shifts as she got older. Even though she was in a bad circumstance growing up, it gave her motivation to be better and have a better life for herself and her children.

            Just as Rene with the math problem, after consistently trying and trying and still not getting to where she wanted to be she never gave up. A famous quote that I like is when the road gets rough you have to keep on trucking. I like this saying because it is true, when things get difficult you have to continue to press through them because not everything is life is easy to get, you have to go through some trials to reach greatness and once you reach your goals you’ll be satisfied knowing that you made it and didn’t give up. For me being in college I have two jobs to put myself through school and there were many times that I wanted to give up. Just as Rene I kept going over the same stuff over and over again she kept going and that is what I have been doing my college career. 

Jasmine Cheatham

Response 1

9/3/14

English 304

Just like the Rosetan’s I moved away from home in search of a better life. I decided that Washington State University would be an outlier for me because it is far away from my home town. The college town has far less crime than my home town and it has given me an opportunity to start a new life. Just as Rosetan’s stayed strictly for Rosetan’s WSU is strictly for WSU, University of Washington fans, students and faculty are not allowed around here.

            Just as the hokey players were trained at an early age to be the best, I was always challenged to be the best in school. The difference between them and I was that I challenged myself. They were chosen and separated from the talented and untalented with age and date of birth as a factor as well in their selection. By joining after school programs and clubs such as the math club and the debate team I went above and beyond some of my peers. By doing these activities at an early age and being consistent with them I was able to do well in high school and gain great habits for college. Just as the hokey players to be in Major Junior A holey success was earned not given. “Canada athletics are better than the US” I’ve heard that statement so many times. Canada sports select talent at early ages in life and devote most of their time to the kids that already show athletic strength and ability, versus the United States which helps children in all stages of athleticism.

            Like a freeway there are many routes to take to get to the same destination. There are many types of successful people. As mentioned there are people that were born into successful families and was given a great amount of opportunity and then there are others that were talented and worked hard to be in the position they put themselves in, success. Lewis Terman had been unschooled since he was seven years old, but he was not dumb or illiterate with an IQ higher than 140 he is an example of a successful, intelligent person. A scout if you will Terman found other intellects and with his ideas he influenced school districts to have gifted programs for students. When I am bored in class I tend to drift off and think about other things because I already know the material, just as Terman wasn’t able to get along with other children could have been due to lack of engagement in the class room.

An eye for an eye, just as the many feuds occurred in the Appalachians and it was considered to be a pattern, in my home town Seattle there were and still are many feuds going on that are leading to many youth deaths and a lot of young people going to jail. There needs to be more than just the court system involved there needs to be community action as well. As bad as something may seem without help it can only get worse. 

Introduction

Jasmine Cheatham

8/27/14

English 304

Introduction

            My name is Jasmine Cheatham; I am from Seattle, Washington. I am currently a senior studying to become a child occupational therapist. My dream job is to work at Children’s Hospital helping children regain their strength and helping them with any other physical problems they may face. I am the youngest child on both sides of my family. I am also a first generation college student. With being a first generation college student I am a mentor to my younger family members and I inspire them to come to college. This accomplishment in my life is something that I am very proud of and I didn’t know it would affect the lives of my family as much as it did. I enjoy being a positive role model and helping them out because I didn’t have this type of support.